untitled

la la la la

please someone tell me what's happening.

where am i going?

words.words.words.

where's the escape?

be a good girl.

where are my friends?

colors. 

bright colors, or not.

warped thoughts.

crazy.

be here.

stay here.

just please don't leave.

and then you...

run run run.

runaway.

i'm insomniac.

tired.

closed eyes, heart.

knock, knock.

i just can't open the doors anymore.

too late.

i'm running too.

i am the same.

no difference.

same blood.

i take your path.

i collapse on the bathroom floor.

cry, cry, cry.

then you say goodbye.

dreams dreams, blah

"when you're all alone in the lands of forever,

lay under the milky way,

on and on it's getting too late out,

i'm not in love this time this night.

can't help if I space in a daze, 

my eyes tune out the other way, 

i may switch off and go in a daydream,

in this head my thoughts are deep,

but sometimes i can't even speak,

would someone be and not pretend? 

i'm off again in my World"

-A.L.

long time no see.

i don't have much to say.

i'm just dreaming, as always.

em...em..eminem?

hello

i just wanted to say that i like Eminem, ha!

it's just so weird, because i never liked rap,

but he's awesome!

his lyrics are great and cool, and all that good stuff.

i remember then i was like six, I heard Em's song Without Me (it's a good thing i didn't understand what he was saying, haha) and i remember i really liked that song's video.

then after that, i remember seeing his other videos, My Name Is, and Cleanin' Out My Closet.

so you can almost say that i always liked him, but i forgot about his wonderful rap, i guess.

so that's pretty much it.

have a great day!

"parents are pissed, but the kids love it"

daddy

all i ever wanted was just a hug, a smile, and some love, dad.

now i'm crying over something i never had.

i know you are a good man, but why did you forget about me, then?

damn.

do you think, it's easy to go out on the street all alone?

do you think i wouldn't like some warm words or your smile?

do you think it's easy to live with a man who hates you?

do you think i never loved you?

well i did and i still do.

but i never get anything back from you.

you can take your money back. i don't fucking need it. 

i only need you to make it up for all these years.
you've always said it was my mom's fault, but you don't even know her.
it was your fault.
you had a potential, but you throw it away for a bottle of vodka and some little whores at your work.
but that was ages ago. I forgive you now.
dad, i love you. i love you!

can you come back and hold me again with your firm grip in the water as you did then i was little then you were trying to teach me how to swim?

can you be a daddy i never had, because i love you, and you don't even know it.

i love the way you lie

just gonna stand there

and watch me burn

but that's alright

because i like

the way it hurts

just gonna stand there

and hear me cry

but that's alright

because i love

the way you lie

i love the way you lie

i love the way you lie

...

but you promised her

next time you'll show restraint 

you don't get another chance

life is no nintendo game

but you lied again

now you get to watch her leave

...

baby please come back

it wasn't you

baby it was me

maybe our relationship

isn't as crazy as it seems

maybe that's what happens

then a tornado meets a volcano

all i know i love you too much

too walk away 

...

if she ever tries to fucking leave again

i'mma tie her to the bed

and set the house on fire

...

just gonna stand there

and watch me burn

but that's alright

because i like

the way it hurts

just gonna stand there

and hear me cry

but that's alright

because i love

the way you lie

i love the way you lie

i love the way you lie

eminem - love the way you lie ft. rihanna

NeverShoutNever - Hippopotamus Heartbreak

haha this song is so fucking random and it makes me smile!

oh my hippo

why'd you go and break my heart

oh my hippo

it started like this

i saw you down by the river bed

we exchanged numbers

and i called you out on our first date

woah oh oh

so tell me, hippo

are we ever gonna be in love again?

i saw you snappin crocodiles in half,

just the other day

crocodiles,

they wouldn't last on your side of the river

oh, woah

in conclusion...

i talked to you yesterday and you said

if you ever come my way again

i got some crocodile skin boots with your name 

printed across the toe...

so don't you know that crocodiles

won't come my way anymore

the maze of my life

i'm so lost.

for a while, it seemed that i knew what i want, and that i knew where my life was going,

but right now i'm sitting here listening to some old songs, and i'm thinking, what if i don't want to live based on a strict plan. 

what if i want to have fun, and rebel a little.

i am a girl, and girls just wanna have fun.

i just want to be that girl.

i want to be wanted.

i want to be that girl that boys go head over heels.

i want to party so hard that i wouldn't remember a single thing the next day in the morning.

but i don't want to waist my life away, either.

so right now, i'm stuck in this stupid moment, without any perspective.

maybe i should just stop worrying so much about non important things, and just start living my life.

don't worry be happy

this lovely pancake told me that there's no place for sadness in this world 

so i must believe it, and just go on with my life and be happy!

p.s. sorry Mr. Pancake that I ate you, but you were just so yummy and irresistible!

i've been thinking

" just so you know,

i've been thinking a lot,

about who we could have been

if i was back home,

just chilling with you and all my friends,

but dear i'm gone; and that's the lousy truth"

.Christofer Drew.

____________________________________________________________

i should go to bed now.

i'm still sad, though.

tomorrow, i'm gonna try my best to be positive, and happy.

it shouldn't be really hard cuz i'm gonna hang out with my friends.

so i'm gonna try to forget my stupid little thoughts.

truth and nothing more

i promise that everything i do and say is true,

but sometimes i get too weak and all i want to do is cry,

because sometimes all i want it's just someone to love, someone to care for.

and yeah i ramble all the time just cos i have no idea how to express myself trough words.

bonfire + marshmallows

i just came back from this bonfire thing,

and i just wanted to say that bonfire plus marshmallows are fucking legit.

that's all, ha.

not caring

i should stop torturing myself, or not.

all i want to do is stay in bed the whole day, and just waste my fucking time.

i don't even care anymore.

i want to get high, and fly far away from this messed up society.

then my heart stops beating

"maybe if my heart stops beating, it won't hurt this much and never will I have to answer again to anyone. Please don't get me wrong because I'll never let this go, but I can't find the words to tell you, I don't want to be alone, but now I feel like I don't know you"

paramore

________________________________

I'm a sad little kid right now. I hate loosing people.

this was how girls left

" I watched her for a long time, memorizing her shoulders, her long-legged gait. This was how girls left. They packed their suitcases and walked away in high heels. They pretended they weren't crying, that it wasn't the worst day of their lives. That they didn't want their mothers to come running after them, begging their forgiveness, that they wouldn't have gone down on their knees and thanked God if they could stay."

 excerpt from White Oleander by Janet Fitch  

trouble trouble

everyone knows rules, but only the fool will follow them.

freedom

"Freedom is not worth having if does not include the freedom to make mistakes"

Mahatma Gandhi 

_________________

I'm not sure if I am doing the right thing right now, but I'm positive that I won't regret anything.

I don't want to hurt the person, but I am not going to be desperate.

I'm gonna live my life.

music

I want to write a song.

I have a lot of ideas and thoughts.

But how do I put them together?

And I need to learn to play a guitar.

It doesn't matter that my guitar has only four strings, and I have no idea where to even begin from, but this is going to be my next year's resolution.

LEARN TO PLAY A GUITAR [!!!]

I just want to know how to play it, because I think it's a great relaxation.

You know, then you feel that everything is falling, you just take your guitar, and go play in the street, and then you just spread love, joy, peace, and all that good stuff to everybody.

the stars

everyone in this world is a star.

everyone shines in a different way.

the way that only they can understand.

the brightness in my head

I had a pretty crappy day, but I've been practicing to be positive about my life. So I'm gonna tell you some of my thoughts that were swirling in my head the whole day.

So here it goes. 

You know, how you hear all of these people talking about life. It seems like they know shit.

But they don't.

They make it so complicated.

Then actually everything is simple.

The life is beautiful, but of course shit happens.

You can do whatever you want to do, because every moment you are dying, so why shouldn't you have some fun.

And nobody should ever forget that to be selfless is pretty cool too.

peace out. LET's PARTEEEE! 

mechanical butterflies

how are two people suppose to meet?

how do you know if they're meant to be together?

well you probably just say, "well you just know then you meet the right person".

but I don't know. I'm not sure how I feel.

it seems that then you meet that person, you just know that he's the one.

but I don't believe in that feeling.

I'm afraid for my heart to be broken.

I'm afraid to love someone, just because I don't want to be hurt.

I know those are stupid excuses.

and my heart gets broken either if I let someone in, or not. 

but then I'm alone I can at least pretend that everything's fine, and that I'm strong, and independent. 

I know that I'm not. I'm weak.

I need someone's shoulder to cry on. I need someone to care about. I need someone to make tea to. I need that hug, then you feel like your life is going nowhere. 

but I'm too scared to admit that I could ever love someone. 

Coffee and cigarettes are a good match, but for me it's only valuable if shared with you.

Though, I stand here alone, I still believe in my dreams. 

One day everything's gonna change; you'll have what you need, and I'll be standing there, right beside you. 

Although, as a wise man once said, "there's no past, nor future, only today..." but I still hope for a brighter tomorrow.

My hope will die the last.

.peace.

lauke spastai.namuose suns nasrai. sirdis, mano plysta pusiau. beliko tik tikejimas geresniu rytojum.

I feel so happy. I'm listening to Foje, and it's just such a good and relaxing music. I'm so happy then I find myself in a situations like this. Then something so little makes me so happy. I just wanna live this music. I just want to let it sink in my soul. I just want to feel the peace and the harmony of everything that's good in this world.

...

so take it easy. i'll make it so easy.

i don't need a war to be happy

"I live in a perfect imperfection" as taip sau pasakiau penktadieni, islipdama is autobuso ir beeidama gatve. As galejau uzuosti vandenyna, palmes, "Subway" sumustinius. Bet as to nenoriu. "Ateikit ir paiimkit tai is manes". As noriu gyventi zmoniu uzesy ir kai eidama gatve paziuresiu i virsu pastatai bus penkiom zirafom didesni uz mane, o kai vakare eisiu gatve man bus truputi baisu del snybzdesiu, bet tas miestas man jau bus zinomas. Kai griziu namo i savo maza buta, issivirsiu kavos su pienu, muzika visu garsu, lakuociau nagus ir ziureciau pro langa. Nes tai gyvenimas kurio as noriu ir as tikiu, kad jeigu tu tvirtai tiki ir eini savo svajoniu link jos issipildo. Tik reikia nepamirsti myleti visus tave sukancius zmones, skleisti taika ir tiketi Dievu. Tai mano gyvenimo junginys.

measure yourself at least once

"And I also know how important it is in life not necessarily to be strong but to feel strong. To measure yourself at least once. To find yourself at least once in the most ancient of human conditions. Facing the blind death stone alone, with nothing to help you but your hands and your own head. " INTO THE WILD


I can quote this movie a thousand of times. I can watch this movie a thousand of times. I can love this movie a thousand of times. but one thing I can't do is to live it, to feel free, to BE free, to face all my fears, and to know that I live for the better.

1 Corinthians 13 4-7

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.